You can't control other people's actions! Another person has the ability to do or say whatever they want. There are so many times that I have to remind myself of this, and this week has been no exception - EXCEPT I have found myself wanting to tell everyone else this. All of a sudden this week especially in the athletic world, we have seen more people called out and called upon to make statements that they may not have otherwise made. I even saw a former player call out their college coach and program.
The thing we must remember even in times like now, are that ANYONE can do what they want at any given time. A lot of people choose to do or not do certain things because they would rather not have certain consequences, but ultimately everyone can do what they want. So when coaches are called upon to make statements they may not have wanted to or been prepared to make, they may not even be sincere. So would you rather have a statement that's not sincere and well written, or would you prefer that one doesn't say anything at all?
We must allow others to be themselves, we are responsible for our own emotions. Although you may choose to do something different or address the situation at hand differently, the great thing is you have a choice. We do this often in our every day life, we try to control what others say or do because we tie our emotional well-being to it. What if what somebody else did or said had no connection to how we felt? Then would we care if someone made a statement or didn't?
We are giving statements across America credit for how we feel right now during this time. We think that these statements that all the companies, coaches, and programs are coming out with are what is going to make us feel better because they have publicly stated that "we matter". But the reality is, their statement isn't what caused you to feel better and start to move forward. So why do you feel a little better after you read a statement? Your thoughts changed a little. Now instead of wondering if the people/companies/programs that you support the most, support you back - now you have a written confirmation that they do. So your thought is now a little more upbeat or calmer.
When we give credit or blame to anything outside ourselves for how we feel, we have given our power away. As harmless as wanting a statement from the people/companies/programs that we support may seem, it is causing us a lot of pain. If our emotions are tied to us wanting those statements- it's not an emotionally healthy thing for us. We can still want to see these statements as they come out, but understand that how you feel is not dependent on the statement, it is purely dependent on what you make that statement mean to you. You can choose to make the statement not mean anything to you personally. You can choose to have your own back and support those around you, no matter who supports you because you support you. You can choose to make that statement mean nothing, you can choose to make it mean everything - or anything in between. BUT the choice is yours and yours alone.
If you want more help on how you can take your power back, set up a free mini session with me here.